Friday, October 23, 2009

A time of reflection

Like looking at an old, black and white photo.

I'm currently waiting for my one-on-one conference with the professor about our most recent paper. Not particularly in the best of attitudes, since, in my opinion, she wasted a lot of time doing these one-on-ones in the first 45 minutes of class while everyone else waited around doing nothing.

Anyway. This week has been a week of reflection. And not just because my paper is about blogs and teachers and critical and descriptive reflections. But I would like to say that I'm not critical of myself enough on this blog. Which I will try to change. Maybe. There are some criticisms I'm not particularly willing to share with the entire cyberworld. I wish teenagers (and adults too) would learn a bit more restraint on the internet themselves.

It's been a tiring week, but a good week. My lessons were decent. My CT, who proclaimed to give me miles and miles worth of notes during my teaching hasn't really given me that much feedback this week. Not sure if that is a bad thing or a good thing. Maybe it's just a neutral thing. We have been extremely busy this week.

I'm pretty sure I will be taking a leave of absence from the MA program in January. First, I'll need to find a job. Second, this potential job may or may not be in the Sacramento metro area. Third, I'm pretty sure my job will take up 150% of my time. The things I do in my classroom now are only things on the surface - I've taken on most of the teaching but my CT still handles the logistics, scheduling, parents, and a myriad of other things. I'm surprised any one teacher can handle the teaching job on their own.

Job comes first. MA can wait. This doesn't mean I won't be studying on my own. Even if I don't have online access to the university library and database (but maybe I will if I subscribe to the alumni association...either the UC or CSU one is fine), I can still physically go to a university library on a free Saturday and read, bring photocopies home. There are also tons of articles in my files from these past two years that I haven't had a chance to properly study using my own sweet time yet.

Last word: still lots to learn. But I need to contribute something outside of academia now.

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